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How to “do” a yoga ashram in India

Mariellen — Sun, 22 Apr 2012 13:38:11 +0000

Yoga Ashram India series on TravelWireAsia

I write a regular ‘column’ for the TravelWireAsia website about India, yoga and travel in Asia (my favourite continent for travel!). Recently, I published a three-part series on How to “do” a yoga ashram in India. Here’s a synopsis of each post — to read the full article click on the link provided.

Part 1: How to find an ashram in India

HAVE you considered going to an ashram in India? This is a 3-part series on where to go, what you need to know and what to expect.

Holy men have been congregating in ashrams in India to meditate and chant since the dawn of time. But they’ve only become popular as a traveller’s destination since The Beatles went to the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi’s ashram in Rishikesh in the late 1960s and yoga became a worldwide phenomenon.

The best way to find an ashram is to ask people you know, especially your yoga teacher. Some of the questions you should ask include: Does the ashram or school take foreign students; do they have a program for foreigners? Is instruction in English? Where, exactly, is the ashram or school; is it accessible and in a place that has access to trains, the Internet, etc. Click here to read the full article How to find an ashram.

Part 2: What to pack and how to get ready for your ashram adventure

Once you’ve decided to stay at an ashram in India, and you know where you’re going, it’s time to start getting ready. Find out everything you can about the ashram – including the amenities, daily routine, accommodations and what you need to bring. Talk to people who’ve been there to find out what it’s really like.

Ashrams are not hotels, they do not come equipped with mod cons and supplies. They tend to be very simple, and you have to bring almost everything you need with you – but remind yourself that you are not going to indulge in luxury. Bring what you need, but bring the bare minimum, such as: all the toiletries you need, including soap, shampoo and medications, a flashlight, a towel, a shawl or sweater (it can be chilly at night in winter and in the mountains), loose cotton clothes, preferably Indian-style (Lululemon spandex just doesn’t cut it), flipflops and/or sandals, etc. Click here to read the full article What to pack and how to get ready for your ashram adventure in India.

Yoga capital of the world: RIshikesh, India

Part 3: What to expect at an ashram and the daily routine

Preparations can only take you so far when you’re travelling or experiencing something new — you have to expect the unexpected. And this is doubly, triply true of travel in India! It’s also especially true of doing something that is off-the-radar for most people from the west, where spirituality, and even just the concept of looking within, is nowadays considered a radical notion.

Looking within is exactly what you do at an ashram, and if you’re new to it, you may not know where to start — or where to look. That’s what the daily routine is for. The daily routine grounds you in the life of the ashram and provides you with a map. The “destination” is your unique experience and epiphanies. When in doubt, follow the routine and have faith that something will happen! And if that something turns out to be a catharsis, the routine will support you as you go through it.

I always go through a few very uncomfortable days of unwinding when I first get to the ashram. I usually feel like I have the flu, but I know it’s the symptoms of a natural detoxification. Click here to read the full article What to expect at an ashram and the daily routine.

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Travel is an experience in perception

Mariellen — Thu, 29 Mar 2012 13:30:25 +0000

Travel to India is like going through the looking glass

When we travel, we learn as much about ourselves as our destinations

WHEN I TRAVEL, especially in India, I feel like Alice in Wonderland; I feel like I’ve fallen into the rabbit hole, or stepped through the looking glass. I lose my bearings and everything is challenged, including my sense of self in the world and my ideas about how life and people should be.

And the experience of being in the alternate universe of a foreign country has helped me become more aware of myself and of the role perception plays in shaping reality.

In India, I meet other foreigners who tell me they think Pahar Ganj in Delhi is “the real India,” and who say the only way to travel in India is by staying in 150-rupee-a-night hovels. I also meet Delhi-born Indians who tell me they think Pahar Ganj is a ghetto and wouldn’t go near it. They prefer Delhi’s five star hotels and the shopping malls of Gurgaon.

When I live with my partner’s Indian family in Delhi, I am accepted into the family and I live as an Indian. But when I travel, I am seen as a foreigner and as if I know nothing about the culture. What’s the truth?

The truth was a mirror in the hands of God. It fell, and broke into pieces. Everybody took a piece of it, and they looked at it and thought they had the truth. ~ Rumi

The truth is, we can only see the world through our own window. And the nature of our window depends on our culture, gender, age, background, experiences, beliefs, judgments, IQ, EQ, and everything else that goes into making us who we are.

Perception is the reason one person loves Thailand and another Rome. Perception is why traveling can be fun and exciting; though you are visiting a place that is “normal” to the people who live there, to you it is novel and highly stimulating.

Perception is the reason one person’s idea of an adventure is to get drunk on the beach with other travelers in Goa, whereas for someone else it would be living in a mud hut for a year in Africa and volunteering to work with AIDS orphans.

I have long been interested in perception and the nature of consciousness. I studied Gestalt Therapy for six years and practiced as a therapist for seven years. I’ve also studied and practiced yoga for close to 20 years. Both say the same things: truth is in your experience, your experience is coloured by your perception, and you are a co-creator in your perception and thus in your reality of life.

And they both recommend increasing your mindfulness — your consciousness — to become aware of yourself. Yoga says you are a drop in the ocean of consciousness. You can become aware of yourself as a single drop and as part of the ocean.

We do not see the world as it is. We see the world as we are. ~ Talmud

I always advise people to go to India with an open and trusting attitude. India is like the cave that Yoda sends Luke into. Luke asks, “What will I find there?” and Yoda answers, “Only what you bring in with you.”

I went to India knowing I would change, but not knowing how. Though I was lucky to have a very soft landing at the beginning of my six-month trip, I was still gob-smacked by the traffic, chaos, colour, and noise. On my first car drive in Delhi, I felt like I was on Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.

Horns honking, cows in the road, bicycles piled high with unlikely goods careening between the cars, no one paying any attention to the lanes or the rules. It seemed like madness.

Five months later, when I strode confidently through Connaught Place in central Delhi and noticed that the touts didn’t bother me — they could see I wasn’t a newbie and therefore not a prime target — I was thrilled. I realized I had found my “India legs” and it felt like one of the biggest accomplishments of my life. I had discovered both inner strength and a much higher degree of tolerance and flexibility.

Since then I have traveled often to India, living with my Indian partner and his family, studying with my yoga teacher in Rishikesh, and trying to learn and understand what eastern spiritual leaders have been teaching since the dawn of recorded time: that truth is in your experience. You are not the center of the universe, but you are the center of your universe.

The wisdom of the ancient rishis (sages), who developed the art and science of yoga, gained their wisdom not with external instruments of measure, but by meditating. Deepak Chopra called them “Einsteins of consciousness.” They used the human mind as a portal to the universe.

The last of human freedoms is the ability to choose one’s attitude in a given set of circumstances. ~ Viktor Frankl

It seems to me that it’s hard to see your own wallpaper. We all have preconceived ideas about the world; we carry around a set of assumptions, but we often don’t realize it until something comes along to shake us up. Like travel.

But even travelers and people who blog about travel spend what I think is an inordinate amount of time trying to get others to agree to their truth; or not realizing that their version of the truth is personal. For example, so many discussions are around trying to figure out what’s “right” or what’s “cool” or what’s “authentic,” whereas only the person who is experiencing it knows whether it’s right, cool, or authentic.

I’m not saying I do not fall into this trap — I do. It’s hard to be a conscious person. But I think it’s worth trying.

I know from my own experience that it can be humbling to find out you are not the center of the universe. But if you learn the lesson with a dose of humility, it can open up a new universe to you. It can open you up to realizing that there is only one thing you can change or control, and that’s your attitude. It is only one thing, but it is a very powerful thing.

[Note: Originally published by Brave New Traveler, January 2011]

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What life is like in a yoga ashram in India

Mariellen — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 13:25:17 +0000

Anand Prakash Yoga Ashram, Rishikesh, India

I love mornings at yoga ashrams in India – it’s a perfect time for meditation or yoga class

The first light of dawn has not begun to rise from behind the Himalayan foothills when the sound of a gong begins to echo through the corridors of Anand Prakash Yoga Ashram in Rishikesh, India. At Aurovalley Ashram, on the outskirts of Haridwar, the buildings are spread out across the ashram’s acres of gardens and you have to wake yourself to be ready in time for 6 am meditation in the silent, white marble meditation hall.

This is my favourite time of day in India. The intense golden-yellow Indian rises like a benevolent god. In fact, the sun has been worshipped in India since the dawn of time. A feeling of sacred reverence seems to fill the air. In Rishikesh, it’s in the sounds of chants, bells and the song of the Ganges River; at Aurovalley, it’s in the sound of birds, the breeze in the trees and the sight of massive tropical blooms. Huge, crimson hibiscus flowers dangle from trees that line the ashram’s pathways, and whole walls are covered in fuchsia bougainvillea.

In the film Eat, Pray, Love – based on the best-selling memoir by Elizabeth Gilbert – Julia Roberts’ character travels to Italy to enjoy food, to India to study yoga and to Bali to, eventually, fall in love. In India, Gilbert purportedly stayed in a yoga ashram in Ganeshpuri, a pilgrimage centre outside of Mumbai (Bombay). But there are countless yoga ashrams all over India.

Rishikesh, India

A place of respite

Ashrams are places of spiritual retreat. They are not meant to be an escape from life; but a respite from worldly pursuits. They offer spiritual seekers an unencumbered place where they can spend time concentrating solely on the spiritual aspect of life. What is the spiritual aspect of life? It is probably different things to different people, but to me, it’s a chance to be quiet, to spend some time on inner reflection and to think about the bigger questions of life – in other words, “what is my purpose in life,” rather than, “when is that hydro bill due?”

There is a set daily schedule, which many ashrams expect you to religiously follow. It depends somewhat on whether the ashram caters to Indian or foreign students: the Indian ones tend to be stricter. Anand Prakash is owned and run by Yogi Vishvketu (Vishva), an Indian yoga teacher and his wife Chetana Panwar, from Toronto. Their ashram is usually filled with western students. Aurovalley Ashram is owned and run by Swami Brahmdev (Swamiji), who follows the teachings of Sri Aurobindo. This ashram attracts both Indian and foreign students – many of them from Colombia or Russia because Swamiji regularly travels to those countries. [To read more about Aurovalley Ashram, read A Haven of Peace and Conscious Living.]

The highlight of the Anand Prakash schedule, for me, is the 6 am yoga class, taught by Vishva in the top-floor yoga hall. The hall has huge picture windows that frame the awe-inspiring site of the sun coming up from behind the Himalayan foothills. In late winter, an invigorating early morning wind rushes down from the mountains – and really does feel like a blast of Shiva energy (Shiva is the god of yoga, and one of the three primary gods in the Hindu pantheon).

Aurovalley Ashram, Rishidwar, India

Relaxing daily routine

At Aurovalley, I love the profound calm of the circular meditation hall, but the day’s highlight for me is satsang, which means, “search for truth.” Every day at 11:30 am, until 1 pm lunchtime, Swamiji sits outside the ashram library, under the mango trees, and answers questions. This is the time-honoured method of spiritual instruction in India.

The day’s flow is dictated by the regular activities – a predictable mix of meditation, yoga, satsang, kirtan (chanting) and meal times. Plus, there is personal time for exercise, exploration, writing, healing (Ayurvedic therapies and massage are usually close at hand) – whatever you choose to pursue. The always-vegetarian food is served in a communal dining hall, and you have to clean your own tin thali (plate) afterward. The food is simple and wholesome, filling and satisfying, though perhaps not to a real foodie.

Breakfast is often some kind of wheat bread – roti, paratha or naan – and fruit or dal (lentils), plus tea. Lunch is usually rice and dal, plus salad or fruit or an Indian dessert such as burfi (a solid milk sweet); and dinner is a whole lot like lunch. The food is only very lightly spiced and does not include garlic or onion; and it is extremely well-washed and purified so that even the most delicate foreign tummy can handle it.

Anand Prakash Yoga Ashram, RIshikesh, India

Accommodation depends on the ashram. In some ashrams, most people sleep in dorms and share washrooms; in others, you can have a private room or share with just one other person, and each room has its own bathroom. The rooms are very simply furnished, but they have everything you need (unless you need a TV, phone and A/C). The simplicity helps to clear your mind. I particularly love the simple, white rooms at Aurovalley Ashram. They were beautifully designed for maximum flow of sunlight and fresh air, and I feel they are very elegant in their simplicity. Solar panels on the roof even provide hot water showers – a treat!

The rules are simple, too: no meat, alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, outside visitors in the rooms. Some also stipulate no sex, even with your spouse (though not usually at the ashrams that cater to foreigners). Previous yoga or mediation experience is usually not required. The most important thing is sincerity.

When I go to the ashram, I take only the bare minimum, which should include all the toiletries you need, a flashlight, a towel, a shawl or sweater (it can be chilly at night in the mountains), loose cotton clothes, preferably Indian-style (Lululemon spandex just doesn’t cut it), flipflops or sandals, sunscreen, mosquito repellent, a hat, long scarf and oil for dry skin; and books, writing materials and mini-laptop. Even ashrams have WiFi these days!

I know that ashram life is not for everyone, but it sure suits me. I find staying in the ashram to be very healthful and creative, and I make time for it every year. A few days can do wonders, but a few weeks – even months – can really make a lasting difference in your life.

For a more photos of Aurovalley Ashram and Anand Prakash, visit my Ashrams Gallery on SmugMug. For those interested in ecotourism or green travel, ashrams are a great option.

[Note: First published in the Toronto Star as Morning is Golden.]

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My 30-day yoga challenge

Mariellen — Sat, 18 Feb 2012 22:04:54 +0000

This was me about six years ago, after yoga teacher training. Photo by Christine Lynes.

A yoga class every day for 30 days

Part 1 of a 4 part series.

Starting today, February 18, 2012, I am undertaking a 30-day yoga challenge: for the next 30 days, I will go to one yoga class a day at Lila Yoga Studio. I am giving myself this challenge because I have essentially spent most of the last three years sitting at my desk, and on my computer, working very hard to get my travel writing and travel blogging career off the ground. I have often worked 16-hour days, writing, organizing Toronto Travel Massive events, building social media relationships, pitching story ideas to online and print publications, trying to get sponsors for Breathedreamgo – all the myriad things it takes to build a successful career.

The toll it has taken on my physical health is a bit grim. Six years ago, in 2004-5, I trained to become a vinyasa yoga teacher, and by the end of the training I was in peak shape and I felt great. From then to now I feel I have aged 20 years: I feel heavy, stiff, out of shape and I’m worried about my spine and joints. Sitting is a killer, there is no doubt about it. So I am taking this yoga challenge to get my energy flowing and my body moving; to lose some weight; and to get back into my yoga practise.

Please follow my journey — which I will update weekly here on Breathedreamgo and more regularly on Twitter and the Breathedreamgo Facebook page.

Day 1: Struggling to breathe

I left only 5 minutes before the start of my first 30-day yoga challenge class, with parka undone, hair unkempt, clutching a bag of thrown-together yoga stuff, like hair band and water bottle — but I still made it on time as I live so close to Lila Yoga Studio. I walked through slushy snow down a grey-day lane, remembering a phone call I had to make on the way, and feeling stressed, disjointed and decidedly un-yogic on arrival.

Lila Yoga Studio, Toronto

I was the last to lie down on the warmly glowing wood floor, and I struggled with the pranayama (breathing exercise) that started the session. It took me some time to settle into the quiet, peaceful space, and the inner awareness needed to stay with the breath. The soothing voice of yoga teacher, and Lila Yoga Studio owner, Shelly Rowen really helped.

Shelly’s calm and gentle presence, and the feeling of safe sanctity within the room, helped me to begin to reconnect to my breath, body and inner awareness throughout the class — but what I found was painful. My hips felt like ship’s tackle, rather than the “bowl of water” I once heard a yoga teacher describe as the ideal state of hips. I had mysterious pains up and down my stiff spine. My neck and shoulders were completely locked and making slightly alarming crunching noises. A tight band of tension around my chest prevented me from inhaling deeply. And a recently acquired “spare tire” around my midriff seemed to get in the way of of forward bends, and made me feel sluggish and old-before-my-time.

Yoga for everyone

“Let the tension release” and “soften the breath” were two common instructions from Shelly, as she led us through our asana (posture) practise, which included pranayama and lotus mudra, a hand movement and prayer to invoke divine blessing.

Yoga teacher Shelly Rowen

Lila (pronounced lee-la) means divine play, or celebration of all life. The studio name captures owner-teacher Shelly Rowen’s light yet profound approach to yoga.

Shelly says, “The practice of yoga helps us to gain an sense of awareness and appreciation of all that surrounds us. At Lila Yoga we believe that there is a yoga practice for everyone throughout the different stages of life; young or old, physically fit or not. Through good health and illness, yoga can be modified and adapted to suit the individual. We encourage practitioners to develop a practice that suits their needs.”

Shelly achieved a long-held dream when she opened Lila Yoga in Roncevalles Village in January 2012. She has wanted to open a yoga studio in this west-end Toronto neighbourhood for 10 years because she believes, as do I, that it’s a very special place. Finally, an opportunity arose — the right space, in the right location — and she jumped on it. Needless to say, I was thrilled, as it is located literally one short block, down a lane way, from my house.

And that’s the idea: Ronces is a charming, self-contained area, much like a small town, and many of us locals never want to leave it to get our needs met. We have shops, restaurants, produce stores, an art house cinema, an herbalist, lots of massage therapists and much more — but until Lila Yoga opened, we didn’t have a real yoga studio. Shelly wants to create a sangha, a yoga community, and she’s in the perfect place to do it.

Let the magic begin

Lila Yoga Studio

Lila Yoga’s philosophy, location and warm, safe and beautiful studio atmosphere are all ideal for my 30-day yoga challenge. And so are the teachers. Shelly hand-picked the teachers at Lila Yoga. They represent all kinds of yoga styles, but they have one thing in common: attitude. “They’re all really nice people,” Shelly says, “as well as being very proficient, they are very supportive and accepting.

“And they don’t teach aerobics yoga! You will never feel like you’re in a gym at Lila Yoga.”

And indeed, I did not feel I was at a gym. I felt I was in a space devoted to heightening conscious awareness and helping people simply be with themselves, and find that sacred grove of inner stillness that we all have.

By the end of the class, I was breathing more deeply, I felt calmer, my hips felt more pliable and the tension around my neck and shoulders had melted, somewhat. Shelly’s low-key style, gentle presence and deceptively simple teaching instructions did seem to magically bring me into a better relationship with myself and the present. It was a great start to the 30-day yoga challenge — though I feel I have a long way to go to reach the state of health and wellness I desire.

Read Part 2: My 30-day yoga class challenge: travelling within.

Read part 3: Day 20 of yoga class challenge: journey of acceptance

Sivasana (corpse pose) at the end of Day 1

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What is Immersive Travel?

Mariellen — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 14:08:02 +0000

Bada Bagh, Jaisalmer: India is my soul culture

Immersive Travel column on Travel+Escape

Last month, I started writing a bi-monthly “column” for the new Travel+Escape website — which complements the new Canadian TV channel — about immersive travel. What is immersive travel? It’s travel that takes you deep into a culture and changes you. Immersive travel can be voluntourism, solo travel or long-term travel. It can be embarking on a spiritual path or a going to a health & wellness retreat. Or it can be simply an attitude. It’s about being open to a new culture, learning from it, and letting it change your ideas, beliefs and assumptions about life and the world. If you go on a trip, and see things differently when you get back home — then, you have probably experienced immersive travel. Here’s a synopsis of my first three columns.

Are you a tourist or a traveler?

If you have men who will only come if they know there is a good road, I don’t want them, I want men who will come if there is no road at all.” ~ David Livingstone

There’s a difference between a traveller and a tourist. Maybe I’m old-fashioned: I prefer reading to television; trains to jets; long sojourns to quick getaways. I love reading stories about travellers who went abroad for months, even years, and became completely transformed. Like Ibn Batutta. He left his homeland, Morocco, to make a hajj (pilgrimage) to Mecca in 1325AD that should have taken 16 months. He didn’t return home for 24 years.

In total, Ibn Battuta traveled for 30 years. He covered most of Africa, Europe, the Middle East, India and Southeast Asia, all the way to China, for a total of 75,000 miles (121,000 km) – a mileage record that held for more than 400 years. Batutta recorded his travels in a book called The Rihla (Journeys) of Ibn Battuta.

I think of the 19th century as the golden age of travel. People packed steamer trunks and ventured out into the world before there was any kind of tourism infrastructure. These people had adventures!

To read more, please visit Are you a tourist or a traveler? on the Travel+Escape website.

Three hotels that off the comfort of luxury with the joy of cultural immersion

When you think of immersive travel, you may think of living in a local’s house, eating home-cooked food and following the family’s daily rhythm. I do like staying in small guesthouses and homestays when I travel, but I also enjoy finding higher-end accommodation that tries to preserve the spirit of cultural authenticity.

The three hotels featured here ― the Bhakti Kutir in Goa, the Windamere Hotel in Darjeeling and the Uma Paro in Bhutan ― each combine the best of both worlds, the comfort of luxury with the joy of cultural immersion.

To read more, please visit Comfort and Joy on the Travel+Escape website.

Have you found your soul culture?

There are many ways to experience “immersive travel.” You can travel somewhere to live for a time, or volunteer. You can study the culture, learn the language or master the arts. But the type of immersive travel I am writing about today cannot be engineered. You cannot make it happen.

I call it finding your “soul culture” and it’s like falling in love. It just happens.

Sometimes, people discover a corner of the world where they feel most at home. It is often in a country and culture far away, and far different, from their own, and it doesn’t make a lot of rational sense.

People who found their soul culture always intrigued me. And, I admit, I was a bit jealous. Though I had traveled to many parts of the world, and lived in Tokyo, I had never felt that special affinity, and didn’t know if I ever would. Then, in late 2004, at about the same time the tsunami struck Southeast Asia, a personal tsunami of sorts hit me.

I was trying to recover from a series of devastating losses that had left me feeling flattened, and was enrolled in a yoga teacher training program. That’s when the idea of going to India for six months grabbed hold of me.

To read more please visit Have you found your soul culture? on the Travel+Escape website.

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The 5 spiritual ideas of social media

Mariellen — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 07:06:54 +0000

Social media is a spiritual discipline

Learning how to “do” social media effectively is a lot like learning a spiritual discipline. There are paradoxes involved, and you have to abandon the traditional western approach of applying ego-based will-power to get results. Here are five spiritual ideas and how social media exemplifies them.

1. The law of attraction

The more you try to “get” results — such as increased sales or traffic — using social media, the more likely you will fail. If you come across as too pushy or too self-promotional, you will be shunned. You can’t use traditional selling or marketing techniques that rely on pushing your message out. Instead, you have to be like a light, a beacon. You have to be attractive, to attract.

This is the paradoxical nature of the law of attraction. The more content, confident, happy you feel as you engage in social media, the more likely you will be to attract attention. Neediness and greediness will have the opposite effect.

2. Letting go of attachment to outcome

If you are concerned with the bottom line, and with the results of your efforts, you will miss opportunities for engagement, for community building, and for nurturing long-term customers and readers. Letting go of attachment to outcome also frees you up to discover what you enjoy, and to do more of that. Plus, it leads you to be in …

3. The moment

The gift of social media is ironic — given that it is done largely when people are alone in front of an electronic device, and their pixels are engaging with other people’s pixels in cyberspace. But if you are truly engaged in social media, having conversations, sharing interesting, important or entertaining information, you are in the moment. Social media gives you the opportunity to interact with others; to notice others, to get interested in who they are and what they have to say, or what they want to share. The more you are able to JUST BE, the more likely you will have satisfying exchanges. It also helps to accept that you have little or no control. Just like life.

4. To give is to get

One of the best uses of social media is curatorial: looking and finding things to share, plus adding your own take and embellishing. The social media net is like a matrix; in fact, it is a lot like the connectedness that spiritual masters teach is at the base of all reality. Movements take root, people inspire each other, they help each other to reach a wider audience, new connections are made, even friendships. The effects of sharing are instantaneous, unpredictable, creative; and the more you give, the more you benefit, both because sharing and being generous are highly valued in the social media world; and also because of the nature of social media and how it works.

5. Go with the flow

Yoga teaches that going with the flow of energy creates efficiency and harmony, and puts you in a more spiritual and creative frame of mind. For example, I am writing this in the middle of the night when I can’t sleep. I am going with the flow of my restless energy — and creating a blog post! Likewise, on social media, it is more harmonious and satisfying to go with the flow, and join in conversations, trends, organized chats. Once you accept that you cannot make things happen — you have to let them happen — you can relax and enjoy … and trust that social media will help sweep you and your business towards your destiny.

And like any spiritual discipline, you don’t just learn these ideas once. You continue to learn and practise, always getting a little more awareness, a little more mastery, until the knower and the knowing meld….

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A new era for Breathedreamgo

Mariellen — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 13:33:40 +0000

I want to transport you!

Changes to Breathedreamgo bring it to completion, and the start of a new era

In Hindu mythology, there is a concept of vehicle — an animal that transports a god or goddess. Ganesh has a rat, Durga has a tiger and the goddess of the arts, Sarasvati, has a swan. To me, as a blogger, Breathedreamgo is my vehicle: it is the means by which I am transporting my work and my passions. And it is also the means by which I hope to transport my readers — to travel adventures; personal transformation and a world of beauty, where the spiritual traditions, history and living mythologies of India come alive.

When I first imagined Breathedreamgo, I wanted it to be a site rich in evocative writing, useful information and engaging resources. I wanted to create a community and a font of inspiration for people to help them realize their own personal dreams, and to share my view of the world, and especially of India, as alive with possibility and magic.

Breathedreamgo has grown slowly, as I have added to it and refined it — along with the invaluable help of my WordPress goddess Jennifer Johannesen from lowtotheground.ca, — and it has now reached a stage of completion, and a new era.

Adding ads to the mix

The major changes are outlined below — but the biggest is the addition of advertising. Yes, Breathedreamgo is in the process of becoming a commercial site! To date, I have never sold a text link, sponsored post or ad on Breathedreamgo — it has been almost 100% commercial free. The only commercial activity on the site was the sale of my book Song of India; and affiliate links to books I love.

Please be assured that I will keep the advertising to a minimum, and that ads will be chosen that are in line with the site’s mandate and values. You will see ads for several charitable organizations that I volunteer for, and believe in — notably World Literacy of Canada and UNICEF — and ads for books, services and products that I hope will offer value.

What’s new on Breathedreamgo

Here are the main changes and additions to Breathedreamgo:

GO BOOKS. I have started a new series on Breathedreamgo called GO BOOKS. See the menu bar, under BOOKS, for the main landing page. GO BOOKS will review books, new and old, that I love and highly recommend. Where possible, I will include a link to Amazon so that you can easily purchase the book. I will only write about books that I truly, madly , deeply endorse. And that is absolutely guaranteed. If you buy a book from Breathedreamgo, on my recommendation, and you don’t like it, I will invite you over and cook you dinner and you can tell me why (some conditions apply).
MAP. I’ve wanted MAP functionality for a long time! Finally, I have a MAP (listed on the menu bar), and I will be plotting all my destination-related blog posts to the map, over the next few weeks or so. I am intending for this MAP to be a main navigation tool — and I may get a bit creative as I plot my posts. For example, my blogs about Shahrukh Khan will all be plotted to Mumbai — though (so far) I have only met him in Toronto. But, hey, he lives in Mumbai and that’s where Bollywood is.
RELATED POSTS. I have added a RELATED POSTS plugin, to make navigating the site easier. The RELATED POSTS are all in the same categories.
ADVERTISE. There’s a new menu bar category, ADVERTISE, and the sub pages all have to do with advertising and sponsorship on Breathedreamgo. On the page ABOUT BREATHEDREAMGO, I have outlined in detail the site’s demographics, metrics and other information about the site’s popularity — including testimonials, speaking engagements and media coverage. There’s also a Sponsorship Proposal PDF — which outlines some great opportunities.
RESOURCES. I started a RESOURCES page awhile ago, and I am continually adding to it. I want this to be a great round up of useful info about travel and culture in South Asia. The latest addition to the page is travel and tour companies that I recommend. Please feel free to make suggestions about what else I should include.

That’s essentially it for now. I am continuing to dream this site into existence, with the inestimable help of Jennifer, and the suggestions of friends and colleagues, especially Red Hunt of RedHuntTravel, Warren Talbot of Married with Luggage, Gary Arndt of Everything-Everywhere, Dave and Deb of ThePlanetD, Evelyn Hannon of Journeywoman, Janice Waugh of Solotraveler and Carsten Knoch. (and all the people on the Global Bloggers Network FB group and who belong to the Toronto Travel Massive).

Breathedreamgo will continue to evolve, as I evolve and as online publishing evolves. Thank you for being part of this process and part of Breathedreamgo’s success and evolution. Let me know what you think, and what you would like to see; what you think I am doing well, and what I could be doing better. I would love to hear from you — leave a comment below.

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Top 5 ways my India travels differ from Eat, Pray, Love

Mariellen — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 02:31:24 +0000

Me, Liz and the subcontinent

I traveled in India and studied yoga, but there the Eat, Pray, Love similarities end

Because I travel in India and write about it, many people ask me if I was influenced by the book Eat, Pray, Love, and they try and compare me to author Elizabeth Gilbert. Here are the five key differences between my story and Gilbert’s.

1. I did not have a hefty book advance to subsidize my trip. My trip to India was not research for a book, and I had to subsidize it myself out of my meager resources. I sold 1/3 of my possessions, gave up my apartment, moved into a small room and scrimped and saved for a year. After I returned, and realized how much I’d changed, I went through a lot of financial instability. The whole experience was a “real spiritual quest,” in the sense that I threw myself into it without any attachment to outcome. A big part of my journey was about throwing myself off the cliff to find out IF a net would appear. Read on for the other four.

2. I did not go to India because of EPL. I was already in India when the book was published so it didn’t influence me. For the record, seekers and travelers have been going to India for many generations. Steve Jobs went to India. The Beatles went to India. Mark Twain went to India. There’s even some evidence that Jesus went to India.

I went to India originally, in 2005, because of two reasons, carrot and stick. The carrot was that I always wanted to go; that virtually since childhood I have been drawn to the “mysterious east” — I painted Maharaja Palaces on my walls, practised Indian dancing, mooned over photos of The Beatles in Rishikesh (especially George) with marigolds around their necks, went out for Hallowe’en in flowing harem pants and a sequined top, etc.

The stick was that over the course of a few short years, I experienced a series of losses — both my parents died and my fiance and I broke up — and I fell into a lengthy and profound depression. I needed to do something to shake up my life, and at the age of 45, decided to go to India for six months to travel, volunteer and study yoga.

3. Gilbert went to three countries; I only went to India. My version could be called Pray, Pray, Pray because I only went to India; I didn’t go anywhere else. And my spiritual journey was a big part of my trip.

Part of the reason I went to India, and one of the things that drew me there, was yoga. But I have to say, I learned as much about yoga just by traveling in India as I did by studying at an ashram. In order to deal with the crowds, chaos, delays, I learned how to:

go with the flow,
find inner stillness,
trust in the universe.

In other words, I learned many of the teachings of yoga.

4. This is not a love story. EPL ends with Gilbert meeting the love of her life, Philipe. I actually did meet a man in India, and became part of his big, fat Indian family, but that wasn’t the point, it wasn’t the ultimate gift of that trip.

I gained so much from that trip, and my subsequent four more trips to India, that I could write a book about it (hey, I did!), but here is the top 3:

I gained a completely new awareness of the world and my place in it. Traveling in India was really the first time I have ever left my “middle class bubble” and stepped out of my comfort zone. It gave me a completely new perspective on life and on myself as a global citizen.
I gained a new career. I started travel blogging and now I publish Breathedreamgo, write travel stories for magazines and newspapers, and I published a book, Song of India.
I gained a new spiritual awareness that includes recognizing the power each of us has to manifest our dreams and remake our reality. We have more control over our minds than we think we do, and less over the circumstances of our life. So the other big spiritual awareness for me was around realizing that I am part of a much bigger consciousness, that we’re all connected, and that everything turns out the way it’s supposed to.

5. Going, going, gone. Gilbert came back from Italy, India and Bali, married her man, and wrote a book about commitment. I never really came back from India. I’ve traveled to India on four lengthy trips since my first trip, and have a career that is largely based around writing about India. Part of my journey has been to open up to another culture in a very profound way, and it has given me so much in terms of meaningful adventure. In fact, in India I discovered my soul culture, and parts of myself that I never knew existed.

Moi on the morning of the Kumbh Mela 2010 in Haridwar

My top travel tip

If you really want to travel, and be a traveler, not a tourist, consider going alone; or if not alone, then make every effort to open yourself up to the experience and let it affect you, let it change you. Let it shatter your biases. Let it provoke your compassion. Let it change you. I call this respectful travel — and it really means not only respecting the culture you are traveling in, but also respecting yourself too. If money is an object, you can find free travel, too.

NOTE: This speech was given at the Toronto MeetPlanGo event on October 18, 2011.

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What spirituality is

Mariellen — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 03:19:21 +0000

Scene from the Mahabharat: Krishna and Arjun at the battle of Kurukshetra

You don’t have to remove yourself from life to “be spiritual”

Yoga philosopher tells an ancient story to illustrate a universal truth

Yoga philosopher, Kirtan leader, Sanskrit teacher, Sitar artist and the writer / blogger behind Akshara Yoga blog: Ram Vakkalanka is accomplished in many things. He is also my friend, I am proud to say. Ram and I have bonded over our deep love and respect for the wisdom traditions and culture of India. We have many shared ideas and notions about yoga and spiritual philosophy, and feel that the essence of these teachings is largely lost, overlooked or misunderstood in the west (and sometimes even in India).

Some time back, I wrote a blog, What yoga is, after attending a workshop with internationally known yoga teacher Mark Whitwell at the Yoga Festival of Toronto. I was delighted to discover that Mark Whitwell really “gets” yoga; and I feel the same way about Ram. Over dosas at a Toronto South Indian restaurant, we discussed the essence of spirituality and Ram told me the story of Kaushika, which I loved. He said, “In the great epic Mahabharata, there is the story an aspiring yogi called Kaushika who meditates for many years but fails to attains self-awakening.” I feel the story expresses a truth about spirituality that many people don’t seem to understand. Here it is.

Kaushika’s story as told by Ram Vakkalanka

There was a young man called Kaushika, who practiced meditation and yogic austerities for a long time in a forest near a city called Mithila in northeastern part of India. One day, while Kaushika was resting under a tree after a long stretch of meditation, a crane landed on top of the branch directly above Kaushika and defecated. The bird’s excretion fell on Kaushika’s head. Kaushika felt uncontrollable wrath at this and looked at the bird severely. As if Kaushika’s angry looks were a deadly arrow, the crane fell down dead. Seeing this, Kaushika thought to himself that be due to his austerities, he attained some kind of extraordinary powers and was proud of himself.

Scene from the Mahabharat: Krishna and Arjun at the battle of Kurukshetra

People practising spiritual austerities in those days were enjoined not to spend time on any worldly activities such as earning money, having possessions and cooking, but devote their time entirely to meditation and other spiritual practices. During this time, it was incumbent upon the householders in the community to support the spiritual seekers with life’s necessities such as food and clothing. This practice served two-fold purpose: the spiritual seeker has to practice control of senses and eating whatever was donated by others rather than entertaining desires for specific, tasty food, helped in that; and, it forced householders to practice charity, communal sharing and promoted a spirit of service. This process of collecting food is called Madhukara.

Poster for the TV version of the Mahabharat

Just as a honey-bee collects honey little by little from many flowers, the spiritual aspirant has to collect his food little by little from different households, without being a burden on any family. The aspirants are allowed only one meal a day and they can ask for food only three times. As per the tradition, Kaushika went into the city to get some food later that day. As luck would have it, Kaushika didn’t get any food from the first two houses he chose that day. Kaushika stood in front of the third and last house for the day, hungry and tired, and asked for food. The lady of the house was busy serving a meal to her family at that time and didn’t respond promptly to Kaushika. Having asked for food three times and not getting any response, Kaushika was about to move on with a little disappointment, when he saw the lady of the house hastily coming out with some food to donate. Starving and impatient, Kaushika looked at her angrily for the inordinate delay in serving him food.

The lady, sensing Kaushika’s anger, looked at him quietly and said, “I was busy serving my family and hence the delay. Besides, I am not a crane to be killed by your angry looks.” Kaushika’s consternation knew no bounds! How did this lady know about the morning’s incident, to which there were only two witnesses: himself and the crane! The lady, as if reading Kaushika’s thoughts said to him, “Yoga is not just about sitting under a tree and meditating. You can attain enlightenment by discharging your responsibilities perfectly and being detached. If you have further doubts, please see the town butcher Dharmavyadha and he will give you all answers.”

Kaushika, quite humbled, silently walked away from there looking for Dharmavyadha, the butcher. As soon as Dharmavyadha saw Kaushika, he smiled, addressed Kaushika by name and remarked about the latter’s encounter with the lady as if he were a direct witness to the incident. This was the second shock for the day to Kaushika. Reduced to dust by the so-called commoners, Kaushika humbly asked Dharmavyadha what kind of yogic practices he practiced to obtain such miraculous spiritual powers. Dharmavyadha said to Kaushika, “I never practiced any spiritual austerities, meditation or yoga like you. All I know is how to do my duty well. I serve my parents and elders, take care of my family, fulfill my obligations to the society and I practice detachment from all this knowing that I am the eternal self and always free.” Kaushika received Dharmavyadha’s teachings with utmost reverence, realized his folly in talking the life of an innocent bird and left with a perfect idea of yoga philosophy.

Yoga philosophy from the masters

Ram Vakkalanka

Adi Shankaracharya, one of the most renowned yoga philosophers, said: Svasvakarmanushthanameva Bhagavataha Puja - fulfilling one’s duties and obligations constitutes highest spiritual austerity and leads to spiritual liberation. Bhagavadgita, one of the most authoritative works on yoga, offers an interesting definition of yoga: Yogaha Karmasu Kaushalam – yoga is perfect fulfillment of one’s duties. In other words, a plumber who does a great job is practicing yoga, an athlete who brings medals to his country is a yogi, a mother who raises a healthy family is a yogi, a leader who leads his community towards progress is a yogi. Yoga is the birthright of everyone; no country, no culture, no color, no race has an exclusive right to it. The housewife, the musician, the mechanic…anyone can (and should) be a yogi.

In fact, one of the most sublime teachings of Bhagavadgita is: Yogasthaha Kuru Karmani - being established in a state of yoga, fulfill your role in the world. If you are a teacher, strive to be the best teacher you can be; if you are an electrician, be the best electrician you can be, if you are a soldier, be the best soldier you can be. Balance your head and heart, realize that you are not simply a name and a form, but the Divine itself and approach everything and everyone in life from a love-based higher view point. Then you will find imperturbable peace and harmony inside and outside. This is the quintessential teaching of yoga philosophy. In the great epic Mahabharata, the story about Kaushika illustrates this point perfectly.

Not that postures and meditation don’t constitute yoga, but that’s not all there is to yoga. Yoga can be practiced by everyone at every walk of life, any every moment of life, on and off the mat!

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Understanding the Indian rope trick

Mariellen — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 01:00:59 +0000

Sylvia Fraser in India, 2000

An interview with Sylvia Fraser

Author of the transformative travel classic, The Rope in the Water

In 2005, as I was getting ready to go to India for the first time, on my six-month “trip of a lifetime,” my friend Chrissy gave me a copy of The Rope in the Water. As I read about Toronto author Sylvia Fraser’s pilgrimage to India, I was struck by the many similarities between us; and completely flabbergasted to discover that we share the same birthday (March 8 – International Woman’s Day).

I loved the book and decided I had to meet Sylvia Fraser; that somehow my destiny demanded it. Well, it took me five years to finally connect with her and I am happy to report that we are now friends. I interviewed Sylvia in February 2011 about her many transformative travel experiences and her reality-defying “rope in the water” story (see below and find out how a non-existent rope saved her life when she was being carried out to sea by a riptide, off the coast of Kerala in South India). Here are the highlights of our interview.

Mariellen Ward: What is travel to you, and why do you prefer being a seeker and going on pilgrimage?

Sylvia Fraser: Travel is something I love to do, it’s a need, not a luxury. If I’m not happy, planning a trip is absolutely the best.

Sylvia Fraser at the Art Gallery of Ontario's Maharaja Exhibit, February 2011

A pilgrim is a seeker … someone who seeks something larger than the life one is living. You have to go on your own. If you go with people that you know, there tends to be a desire to recreate what you left behind, maybe a little bit better. If you’re going to find your own kind, or better your status, that’s a different kind of travel than what I’m talking about; it’s a vacation.

There’s ways of opening yourself, but retaining a sense of who you are, and that’s what I think is the most exciting kind of travel. Could one include seeking and finding a mate – like Eat, Pray, Love? I suppose so – whatever opens up your world. It depends on what stage you’re at in your life.

In travel books, women are always pulling that one. I notice a lot of travel books by women are like that, “My thousand days of love in Venice.” With men it’s all about derring do and extreme adventure.

MW: What attitude do you recommend seekers take?

SF: I think it’s a matter of going with an open mind. Being willing to put aside your own beliefs (though not values) and see what other people, what other cultures have to offer. Then decide what works for you and what doesn’t work for you. The more choices you allow yourself in terms of who you want to be and what you want to do, the more you will lead a fulfilled life.

My advice … try and know what stage you are at in your life. See what countries, what interests, draw you. There are many keys, follow your greatest interest. Do your best to understand what draws you. It shouldn’t be because someone writes a bestseller, like Eat, Pray, Love … it doesn’t mean you should go and eat, pray and love. And it’s all right to change your mind enroute.

MW: What makes a person a seeker?

SF: People who have experienced trauma in their life, and especially people who have experienced it as a child, tend to have to look a little bit deeper, and higher, for purpose in life. The ordinary, usual things may be quite delightful … but wounds that make one suffer, make one look deeper. In my case, it was incest, sexual abuse by my father, and though I blocked it out of my conscious mind, it was a motivating force all my life. The incident that pushes you down, can give you wings to fly higher – and that’s when you become a quester.

The question that intrigues me most – and I’m always looking for the answer – is what is reality? I really want to know, in the deepest sense. It goes well beyond physical reality… then we get into the big “M,” mystery. And the thing about mystery is that you can’t define it.

MW: What did you learn from finding the rope in the water, when you were in India?

SF: One thing I’ve learned through science and philosophy, is that the material world that we in the west believe in so powerfully is fragile. This became emphasized to me when I was in India, most specifically when I was being carried out to sea by a riptide and reached down and found a rope in the water and pulled myself ashore. That’s a very condensed version of the story I told in my book, but that’s what it boils down to. That rope felt extremely real to me, and to everyone watching me being swept away. How I came to be here now only was because I found that rope in the water.

That was a very dramatic demonstration to me of what I already believed in … the physical world is not as real as we pretend it to be. Quantum physicists know this, they’ve known it for 100 years. It’s very slow to seep into our consciousness in the west.

The description of the universe given by the seers of Asia is that of a non-material universe in which all material is illusion – which is essentially the one now on the drawing board of quantum physicists.

The experience of the rope in the water was so overwhelming, at first I denied that it happened. I’m not sure it could’ve happened anywhere else. I definitely think that things like that are much more likely to happen in an environment in which people believe they can happen.

We should pay a lot more attention to our emotions, relationships, the things that are most valuable to us, that are not physical, that aren’t something you can buy and consume – that come about through caring, compassion and through living one’s life as well as one can in a meaningful way.

Mariellen Ward and Sylvia Fraser, July 2011

MW: What is it about India that makes it special?

SF: There’s certain countries where I instinctively feel at home, and India’s one of them; I can’t really explain why.

India is one of the few countries in the world that has an unbroken spiritual tradition going back 4,000 or 5,000 years. India gives travelers like us another gift, and that is English – which is spoken all over the country. And India is India. Unlike other countries in the “mysterious East,” that are following the American model, India had had a taste of Europe (i.e. Britain), absorbed it and remained India. Even if you just looked at a crowd, you saw people, especially women, dressed as they always were. It’s a large complex culture that has kept in touch with itself.

When I went to India, I decided to adopt Indian philosophy – which is that anything that happened to me, happened for the purpose of teaching me a lesson. I’m not sure how much I believed in that when I started out, but I was totally amazed how well that worked. One thing led to another and things that didn’t look like they would add up, eventually did. Also, I noticed karma – if I did something nice, something nice would happen. If I lost my temper and got crabby, that would reverberate in some unpleasant way.

India is a jewel box of all that. Many drawers, many cabinets. And the people are wonderful.

MW: What about the return home?

SF: I’m always happy to come home. I’m not escaping anything; I’m enlarging. I like my life here in Toronto. I have even been known to cut a trip shorter because I just want to come home. I always tell myself, I can go back. Maybe it’s about having faith in the future.

But if a country really draws you and you don’t want to leave, maybe you should go and live there … maybe you’re not finished …

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